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I'm dead chuffed with myself that I'm actually writing this on the right day! I'm also pleased because a friend just emailed a lovely passage that I am going to copy and paste into this blog! It will mean that I can nip off to my bed soon, feeling that I've accomplished the days tasks.

That makes it sound like I don't like doing this writing a blog thing which is untrue. I love to write. I'll happily pick up a pen or pencil and write shopping lists or to-do lists or write in my journal. I actually miss writing good old fashioned letters to people. Worse still is that I miss getting them!

Back on the subject of communication this week, it seems? It is the single most important thing that makes for a happy life! We all need to be better at communicating, both with others and (more importantly) with ourselves.How many times do you have a nice positive conversation with yourself??? What-that many??

Now think of the negative conversations that you have with yourself. I bet that they are far more numerous but if they are not-great!

I'm so much better than I used to be with cutting myself slack. I tend to realise that the action/inaction was the problem and not me as a person.

How often do you tell yourself "I was really stupid"? or "I was really awful"..........

Instead you need to realise that what you did/didn't do was stupid or awful and not you personally.

It's all in the wording and negative self-talk, even in a joking manner does nothing for your self-esteem.

Making out that it's just a big laugh that you're so dumb or hopeless still does no favours for your self-image. Your sub-conscious doesn't hear the tone or know that you're just trying to make the situation better for others by making yourself the brunt of the jokes. It only absorbs the words, even the silent ones.

So, for this week (and this sounds familiar but if it's been said already it's never too much to hear it again) I want you all to be nice to yourselves. Don't go giving all your love to others by saying wonderful things to them. Look in the mirror and say something nice to yourself each day. If the mirror routine scares you too much just speak to yourself nicely before you go to sleep at night. Tell yourself how well you did every single simple thing that you did that day, even if you don't believe it and it seems silly. Remember, your subconscious only hears the words and will respond very favourably with regular practice of this technique.

For those of you who really do not like yourselves, Crab Apple is a lovely little Bach flower remedy to help you accept all that you are (amongst other things) When combined with Pine (which helps with feelings of being unworthy of deserving good things and for always thinking you could have done better) there is a splendid chance that you will be able to begin to see yourself as others see you! Wonderful!!

And on that note, this wonderful woman is going to paste the passage and go to bed!

Till next time,

Lx

Be happy where you are

Dr. Richard Carlson

One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that
all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical
rose garden over the horizon – instead of enjoying the roses
that are blooming outside our window today. – Dale Carnegie


Sadly, many of us continually postpone our happiness – indefinitely.
It’s not that we consciously set out to do so, but that we keep
convincing ourselves, “Someday I’ll be happy.” We tell ourselves we’ll
be happy when our bills are paid, when we get out of school, get our
first job, a promotion. We convince ourselves that life will be better
after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are
frustrated
that the kids aren’t old enough – we’ll be more content when they are.
After that, we’re frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We
will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage, We tell
ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or
her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice
vacation, when we retire. And on and on and on!

Meanwhile, life keeps moving forward. The truth is, there’s no better
time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will
always be filled with challenges. It’s best to admit this to yourself
and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from
Alfred D’ Souza. He said, “For a long time it had seemed to me that
life was about to begin – real life. But there was always some
obstacle
in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished
business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would
begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”
This
perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness.
Happiness is the way of life.