Closet X-Factor watcher

Closet X-Factor watcher

I know that it's only Monday but I tossed and turned all night with thoughts of young Aiden Grimshaws battle with his emotions last night on X Factor. This is the first year that I've really got into the whole X-Factor thing, mainly because my daughters watch it and it's a time that we spend together. Plus I was captivated by Aiden from the first time I saw him, not only because I loved his voice but because his mannerisms and expressions reminded me of my own 18 yr old son who's missing from the house just now. I have even been watching his video diaries, with the girls, as a little fix of 18 year old "male-speak." Having watched Andrew, through the years, I am aware of how young men struggle with the whole "supposed to be brave and not cry" thing and it was incredibly painful to watch a wonderfuly talented young man trying to stuff down a volcano of emotions which were threatening to explode, exposing how he was truly feeling. I can only imagine how his own mother was feeling as she watched his struggle to maintain composure. Me, I was sitting sending Reiki-healing to the whole situation, which may sound bonkers to those of you who are not in to such things but it was all that I could offer Aiden in his battle for strength.

If I thought that it wouldn't be chucked straight in the bin, I'd mail him some Bach Flower Remedies to help him to pick himself up and to help him see how brilliant he is. His comments about nobody liking him and having no voters to pass on to Matt were an attempt at humour, to cover his hurt and belief that perhaps no-one did like him or vote for him. A tactic that so many of us use to hide from others our real feelings which only makes how we feel, feel worse. I suspect that today Aiden will be trying to put on a brave face and be making self-directed jokes in an attempt to convince everyone that he's "Fine". Anyone who knows me knows that I hate that word when used to describe feelings and my friends always have to think of a different adjective when I ask how they are. If I was to send Aiden a mixture of remedies to help him bounce back I'd start with Agrimony, which is the remedy for those who hide how they are feeling behind a smiley face. It's my teenage boy and man remedy because they are notorious for keeping how they are feeling to themselves in case people would think badly of them for not coping. It helps you to worry less about other peoples' opinions and to be able to share how you are feeling thus releasing secret, potentially torturous thoughts. People in need of Agrimony often keep themselves distracted from looking at how they feel by keeping themselves permenently busy. They may stuff down their feelings with alcohol, drugs or food or they may lose themselves in t.v or books to escape them. Taking Agrimony allows you to face conflict within and outwith yourself and to risk others seeing and potentially disliking the real you. It allows you to say what you want to without worrying about the other persons reaction. It allows you to allow yourself to feel lousy, knowing that it is okay and that it will pass.

My second remedy in the Aiden Grimshaw-mix would be Gentian which is the remedy for despondency and will help pick you up when there has been a setback, such as being voted off the X-Factor. Rather than throwing up your arms and giving up altogether saying "what's the use?" Gentian helps you to have hope and faith that everything will be okay and to move forward. It helps to lift depression from a known source-such as no longer being in the X-Factor.

Thirdly, I think I'd put in some Star of Bethlehem which is for any kind of shock to the system, be it a physical injury or an emotional shock like Aiden hearing his name as the person going home this week from the X-Factor. Star of Bethlehem is the "soother of sorrows" and is used to help healing of any sort. It helps the energy system to get rid of any trauma and to promote healing. We should never underestimate the damage that emotional shock can do to us. If a trauma is not adequately dealt with it can lead to emotional or physical problems later which may be difficult to find a reason for. By using Star of Bethlehem for any shock that comes along (tiny, like a jammed finger in a cupboard door or huge like a bereavement) we can avoid an accumulation of trauma in our energy system, which will help keep us healthy. Star of Bethlehem is one of the remedies in Bach Rescue Remedy, so keep some handy for any little shock that may come along. I find it incredibly brilliant when I burn myself with the iron-I simply spray it right on and the burn seems to just disappear!

Walnut is my favourite remedy, as I've stated many times. It's the remedy for change and protection and I would put it in the water-supply if I was Prime minister. It's in the Aiden Grimshaw-mix because he has just had a big change happen, in that he has had to leave the X-Factor. But prior to that, he's just left school. Young Mr Grimshaw has a lot of change happening just now and he is also surrounded by influencial people who may influence him in ways that he feels are wrong for himself. Walnut helps you to be strong in your own beliefs and to know your own mind. It helps you not to be influenced and interfered with by stronger personalities. Aiden will have a huge amount of change and many new people around him as he moves forward from this point and he needs to be captain of his own ship and be able to adapt to whatever changes occur.

Honeysuckle is the remedy which helps you to let go of the emotions attached to an event in the past, even if the past was only yesterday. If you find yourself reliving an event over and over again, with the same emotions and you can't seem to let it go then Honeysuckle will help. I would add it to the Aiden Grimshaw-mix because it is likely (from my experiences) that Aiden will be finding it difficult not to get stuck in the past and may not be able to enjoy what life's bringing him today and tomorrow for hanging onto his X-Factor disappointment. Honeysuckle also helps you to not feel homesick and may help Aiden to miss Matt and the X-Factor house less.

Larch is the remedy for those who lack confidence and who find it difficult to believe that they can achieve what they want. It helps to change "I can't" into "I can" and combining it, in the Aiden Grimshaw-mix, with Gentian for encouragement it would help Aiden to have the confidence to go after whatever he wants in the coming weeks and months. Having said that, Aiden struck me as an incredibly shy guy and he may benefit better from Mimulus which is the remedy for those who are shy. Mimulus is also for known fears and helps people who are afraid of specific things-including success or "shining". I use this remedy a lot because I am a Mimulus-type and become afraid easily, am shy and sometimes find it really hard to put myself out into the world doing what I do, despite the fact that I love it.

There are many other remedies such as Willow, if Aiden is feeling resentful and "sorry for himself" (and rightly so, you may say) Resentment is better let go as is hurt and anger for which Holly would be the remedy. Although it is not wrong to feel these emotions-in fact it is perfectly healthy and normal-using the remedies helps you to let go of them and feel better, which is what we should all want to feel. Similarly, if he's feeling heart-broken or extremely sad, Sweet Chestnut is the remedy to lift him out of that so that he does not get stuck in a painful, lonely place.

Finally, for my Aiden Grimshaw-mix suggestions, I would offer him Hornbeam which is for boredom and procrastination. He mentioned that he finds it difficult to get out of bed in the morning and this remedy is another fab one for the teenager. It helps to eliminate that "tired at the thought of getting started" and can change the humdrum/stuck in a rut feeling to one of being interested and motivated. It's just a thought:) I take it when I find myself having deja vu whilst hanging up the laundry and thinking that I'm reliving an exact moment.

So, that's my take on last nights X-Factor and my closet-watching of it. My White Chestnut is kicking in and I'm not thinking so much about the whole system of talent shows so hopefully I'll have a quieter mind for the rest of the day.

If nothing else, it's got me writing a bit extra this week and for that I am grateful as I do love to write:)

Sending out my usual happy thoughts to all (especially Aiden and his mum)


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