Bach Flower Consults Online

Happy Sunday despite our national teams defeat today to Wales. What is it about our little nation that finds our sportspersons just missing the mark time after time ? We see it in Andy Murray failing to win an Open. We saw it in Colin Montgomery with his Opens. We see it most years with our football and rugby teams.

My family laugh when I say that it's all because we think that we don't deserve to be the best. We get soooo close but when number 1 is up for grabs, we hesitate and don't want to make the opponent feel bad by beating them. I tell them that I am entitled to my opinion, laughable or not. I can identify with the fear of success and shining too brightly. I was bullied for it as a little person and it has taken my to middle age to almost shake off the need to hold back a bit from standing out.

This meditation is shining wee rays of light into bits of me that are still dark. I am hopefull that by its conclusion, I will be able to fully embrace my power and go for all the things that I ever dreamed off without the fear of people judging me or failing. There is no failure, only learning and the only person that is important, when it comes to judgement, is me. If it feels right for me then it is right for me.

Today was a 6.30 start again as Ali and I do her paper round together at 8ish. I managed to do meditation last night and this morning and all the boxes are ticked for the first week.

I now need to read week 2s chapter. I hope that it's not going to double the time of meditiation-eek. My feet get a bit numb as it is. I think I need to put a cushion under my bum :-)

No wine last night-did think about it as we were sitting watching a movie-it's a bit like Pavlovs response.

Movie = wine :-)

But I didn't and it really is much better to go to bed with a very clear head. That said, I'm off to watch another movie-with Jen this time.

Ok-now you see a pattern and it's perhaps all the movie-watching that has to change. If I keep myself busy doing work/reading/meditation I won't be able to drink wine 'cause I lose my focus.

Did I mention that I am reading the Bible? My friend gave me her copy of the chronilogical 365 day readings bible and I am up to date. It is very interesting and I plan to see the whole thing read by the end of 2012. It is my 'inspirational' reading of the evenings (as per med' programme)

Anyway, keep reading-there may be a whole side of me that you never knew existed at the end of this year :-)

Much love going out to all

Lxxxx