I choose to be happy despite Andrew not being here.

I choose to be happy despite Andrew not being here.

And the freezing temperatures just keep on coming.......practice for when we move back to Canada, I suppose. I don't mind the cold, as you can get wrapped up against it. Much better than the rain that we normally get, which leaves you very quickly feeling cold and damp and miserable. However, as always, it would seem that our little country simply grinds to a halt when the beautiful white stuff arrives and becomes worse still, when it stays for 3 weeks.

Ali and I have trudged through the snow on 3 very snowy, very cold Sunday mornings and we've actually enjoyed it. The papers, as always, have weighed a ton but there's something wonderful about delivering a paper to someone who might otherwise be unable to get one. There are some especially grateful, older people who have hurried to open the door so that we don't have to fight with keeping the papers snow-free as we try to get them through the letterbox in one piece. Yesterday a friend suggested that we use a sledge.....now why didn't anyone in this house think of that? Maybe this Sunday we'll do just that as there's no sign of the air warming up to melt the snow and we may well have that perfect Christmas-card looking Christmas day.

As I've already mentioned, I love the snow and have not been affected by its presence. I have watched in sympathy, the many thousands of people who have not been as lucky as me. Those stuck in road, rail and air travel chaos and disruption may find it difficult to feel the Christmas spirit as they become more tired, cold and hungry, struggling to get where they want to be. Those people may want to strangle me for my belief that we can still be happy despite our circumstances, if we look inside ourselves to see how amazing we are, just to be able to do that.

We are such complex structures who pay little or no attention to the wonder that is us. We tend to look for perfection outside of ourselves, for ourselves, when in fact we are magnificently perfect just the way we are. Bring your attention to your breath for a minute...........................see its rate and its rhythm. Don't change it-just notice it.........go on.........................................................................................................................









How magnificent is that. We do that all the time-breath, without even thinking about it. The next time you are feeling a bit frazzled, NOTICE your breath for a minute and see how much you calm down. This will work even better if you use your 1 minute of smiling in conjunction with it.

I defy you to still feel as stressed after a full minute of smiling as you observe your breath. It's the wonder of being alive and human.

You may think this all sounds airy fairy and that's completely up to you to do. We all have a choice as to how we feel although a large proportion of us would disagree with that. We all have stories about ourself that we think we have to identify with. Stories made up from what we were taught and exposed to as children and young adults. Stories we came to believe about ourselves.

Newsflash-we are not a story. Our experiences can sometimes make us see a totally different perspective to something than what was meant by its presenter. If you are in a positive frame of mind, you will see a situation from a positive angle. On a different day, whilst in a negative frame of mind, you will see nothing positive about the situation.

So, I ask you this. Is it not better to do everything you can do, to be a positive person rather than look for the negative side of things?

Some may call me bonkers and say that they are just being realistic with their views. What would the harm be though, in looking positively at everything? Finding a silver lining in the blackest cloud is possible and it will help you feel better about that cloud. Plus the cloud will shift quicker if you refuse to be engulfed by it.

If you're open to being more positive about yourself and about all the wonderful things you might attract into your life, give a little thought to the Bach Flower Remedies.

This old bird did not used to be so free-spirited or optimistic. I have reached this place in my life with love and support from those who have walked the path in front of me and who were willing to share their experiences on how to be happier and more positive.

We all have "struggles" but if we treat them like learning experiences and look for the lesson they want us to know, the struggle disappears and acceptance of our adventure steps forward.

I, for one, am up for the adventure and look forward to helping anyone who may want to join me on it as I strive to maintain a positive attitude and continue to smile for my minute every day (actually, it's way more than that now!)

And finally, I want to tell you that, as Christmas has approached (at a rate of knotts, I have to say) I have found myself missing Andrew. It crept up on me with little things, like decorating the Christmas tree and buying the gifts, not feeling quite right. And then, on Monday I realised that my heart had an ache and that it was due to And's absence. I find it fantastic, recognising and accepting an emotion. I simply sat with it, shed a few mums tears and made myself up a bottle of remedies, which included Honeysuckle. Today I wrote my son a letter and my eyes leaked a little bit as I told him how I had been feeling. The ache is lessening already and it will be gone soon-of that I'm sure.

We all experience negative emotions at times and it's how we deal with them that affects how we live our life. I choose not to miss my son and to instead be glad that he has had the courage to leave the comfort of home, to experience life without his family around him. I am very proud of him and missing him will not prove that I love him more than not missing him (although I know that some would beg to differ)

I choose to be happy despite my son not being here for Christmas. And so I'm taking Honeysuckle to prevent me from wishing that he was that wee boy again, who just wanted his mum. That would do neither of us any favours.

Sending out much love and positive thoughts to all who read this. I do get comments from some of you, which is great-I just need to find out how to get them displayed on the website for everyone to read.

Have a Peaceful and Happy time over Christmas and I'll try to post something next week,


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