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This morning, during my second cup of coffee, I watched a video which was promoting 'Stop Bullying' and for a start, I always believe that I campaign will be more successful if we are focused on the outcome, not on the problem. So, what would my promotion on this subject be called? 'Pro-Acceptance'? 'Be Kind'?........I don't know but that is what we want, isn't it. To be nicer, kinder, more loving, more accepting..... to everyone that we come into contact with.

I have titled the post 'Teenagers' but the fact is that emotions are emotions and it doesn't matter what age you are. From a baby to the elderly, the emotions are the same but the situations causing them and the abilities to deal with them are different at each age. But they are also experienced uniquely and individually by each one of us.

Terror is Terror, whether it comes from the fact that you feel terrified at the thought of getting on a plane or terrified that you are going to be bullied at school. The emotion is the same but the situation is not.

The Bach Flower Remedy, Rock Rose is the remedy for terror and it helps you to be able to go through a situation without feeling frozen to the spot or sick to your stomach. It brings the fear down to a more manageable level. Once it is down, you then may want to use Aspen (for feeling anxiety around unknown situations like what'll happen today at school?) or Mimulus for a known fear (I have gym class and I feel scared of the bully who will be there) Rock Rose is in Rescue Remedy as is Cherry Plum and so it's a great gift to give a teenager, not only for them to have in their bag for 'emergencies' but also to be used regularly, to diminish terror and the feelings of being scared of losing control.

The Bach Flower Remedy, Cherry Plum is the remedy for those who feel like they may lose control and do/say something that they know they'll regret and that they would never do under 'normal' circumstances. Suicide comes into that category and, from my own personal experience of needing Cherry Plum, I felt that if I didn't do something to calm the irrational thoughts in my head, I may have done something to make them stop. Cherry Plum helps to calm the mind, settle the irrational thoughts and bring down the feelings of 'about to explode' and it works quickly.

Our most extreme feelings are the ones which respond the most quickly and sometimes even the first 'dose' of Rescue Remedy can be felt as a huge relief from the internal pressure of your mind. Unless you've experienced this relief, it's difficult to believe that something so simple can work.

I have come across three teenagers this week who have all identified the need for these two remedies and I suspect that on any given day, there are millions of teenagers who's feelings of terror and fear of losing control could be helped by giving them a few days or weeks of Bach Rescue Remedy.

Not present in the Rescue Remedy but a very important remedy that can help teenagers is the remedy Agrimony, which is for those who feel that they can't share how they truly feel because they are afraid of conflict and the judgements of others. Teenagers are not alone in feeling this but I think that the negative Agrimony state begins in childhood when we realise that being honest can cause others to react unfavourably and so we begin to pretend, so that we fit in. Agrimony helps you to tell others how you feel without worrying about their judgements or whether there will be conflicts. It also helps you to look at how you are feeling without trying to hide from any darkness inside by doing something to avoid unacceptable, difficult feelings. Taking drugs, alcohol, food or keeping yourself ultra busy can all be indications of you trying to avoid feeling your feelings. Agrimony can help a teenager to share their feelings which then brings in the help and knowledge of them not being alone or the only one to be thinking that way.

And finally, for now, the remedy Walnut. Ah, my most favourite remedy although it's not one which people often place high in importance. It is the remedy which helps you adapt to change. Change is the one constant in life (and I write about that often) and it can be very unsettling for teenagers. But as well as external change of changing teachers, schools, friends, a teenager has to cope with the physical and hormonal changes going on inside them and so it's no wonder that a lot of them get into trouble. They don't have the coping mechanisms of an adult or the freedoms of a child and so they struggle between wanting to be safe and protected and being independent. Walnut helps them to adapt to and cope with change without feeling unsettled by it. It also helps them to be strong in who they are and what they want, without allowing others, who may be stronger, to interfere with them and pull them from their path. I like to call it the protector and I certainly use it myself when I know that I am going to be around strong-minded people, to maintain my own power.

Hopefully this blog has been helpful. I am sure that I have written on these remedies before and there are many more which can help the individual teenager to feel better.......but that's another times blog.

Much love, 
Lxxx