Using the Bach Flower Remedy Water Violet for the 'hiding my gifts from the world'

Using the Bach Flower Remedy Water Violet for the 'hiding my gifts from the world'

I wanted to write a little bit about the Bach Flower Remedy Water Violet because I posted, in my daily 3 Girls and 4 Suitcases blog, that I 'didn't like people' but that 'I loved to help them'.
Strange comment for a therapist to make, I imagine lots of you are thinking?
Well, It's a strange feeling for me to have but one that I have experienced in varying degrees, on and off, for most of my life. I have used mechanisms to cover it up from even myself and although I have had glimpses of being a Water-Violet type, there have always been reasons why I (or others) have discounted it. I believe that my biggest cover-up has been a humungous (great word, not sure about the spelling) case of Agrimony imbalance, where I have spent my life covering up who I truly am because I have been afraid of judgements and conflicts and criticism.....and of course, I wanted everybody to like me.......all negative Agrimony symptoms. If you add my need for alcohol, to keep up the pretense that really is a big negative Agrimony imbalance.
Over the many years of using the Bach Flower Remedies, I periodically have used Water Violet but have tended to go for the Agrimony first. I think what has been happening recently is that FINALLY, my Agrimony imbalance is settling and my Water Violet imbalances have been able to surface in plain sight.
Because I haven't really had to be sociable to anyone over here, I have allowed myself to feel the awkwardness that goes with approaching others. Because I haven't had to approach many people, I haven't had to run away from my feelings but have been able to sit with them, accepting them, identifying them and then adding Water Violet to my mix as the main remedy required.
In the past, I have chosen to fill my mix with remedies that help on a day to day basis but because I haven't been working or socializing, I haven't really needed too many remedies. Beech, yes.....for the snorer in the library and Walnut for the changes but nothing too major that can't be fixed with a couple of doses of a remedy.
In their positive state, Water Violet types are comfortable in both their own company and that of others. They are able to approach others, knowing that their talents and gifts are for the greater good of all.
I have been hoarding mine for the last 92 days, unable to find my way out of my isolation. Feeling a barrier between me and others that I couldn't break my way out of. To be seen by others, they'd class me as 'stand-offish' because I don't look their way but simply do what I have to do-eyes straight ahead.
It's a different feeling from being scared/shy (mimulus) or lacking confidence (Larch) and it is very difficult to describe, even as one who teaches about the remedies.
I often say to people, think about how you respond in stressful situations and when you are ill and it gives you an indication of your 'Type'. Some people feel sorry for themselves (Willow) Some people are needy (Chicory) some people joke it off (Agrimony)......Me? I just want to withdraw and have people leave me alone, me, myself, I.
So, I hope that's made a wee bit sense to people. I don't dislike others per say. I just feel different and not needing of others and am happiest in my own company........for now.

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